I didn’t plan to build an empire of shrimp.
But… here we are.
1-2-3-4!
[Verse 1]
I minted a guy with a shrimp on his head
Didn’t think much — just laughed and said:
“Well that’s kinda funny, what else have we got?”
Oh dang, it’s a captain - so I instantly thought…
A match has been made, twas meant to be,
a captain and sailor out on the sea.
It was clear as day, whether I like it or not,
And just like that… a shrimp boat I got!
[Chorus 1]
Shrimpin’ ain’t easy when you don’t eat shrimp
Can’t stand the smell, get queasy and limp
But now I got boats and tacos and tees
And everyone’s shoutin’ “More shrimp, please!”
[Verse 2]
Next thing I knew, this sweaty ol’ chef
Showed up lookin’ like he’d run outta breath
Grease on his face, towel round his neck
I thought, “This man’s seen shrimp — what the heck”
So I gave him a truck and a stove on wheels
Told him, “Sling what sells, don’t care how it feels”
Now it’s tacos by the pier with spicy delight
And my face turns green as I sprint out of sight
[Chorus 2]
Shrimpin’ ain’t easy when your guts say no
But your island says “shrimp” everywhere you go
There’s shrimp on the shirts, shrimp in the lore
Shrimp in the plushies you sell at the store
I built a paradise, salty and sweet
But I gag at the smell… of my own damn fleet
[Bridge]
Geffy’s the captain, Treyfle’s the hat
Chet’s fryin’ tails like a coastal brat
Skeeter sells bait with a snarl and a wink
And I’m in the back… avoiding that stink.
Fishing’s the rage, the pier’s the heart
The merch is a hit, it's a damn fine art
But when folks ask, “What’s your favorite dish?”
I just lie and say… “whatever’s fresh.”
(it’s not.)
[Final Chorus]
Shrimpin’ ain’t easy, but the net got tight
And now I live in crustacean fright
I’ll sell the dream, I’ll push the flair
But don’t you dare put that stuff near my chair
So cast your line, and toast your trip
Just know the truth behind the script:
The king of shrimp, with badge and brim…
Built it all —
But won’t eat them.
[Outro]
Shrimpin’ ain’t easy…
Shrimpin’ ain’t easy…
Shrimpin’ ain’t—
(splat)
"Aw hell, who put cocktail sauce on my seat?"
